“He doesn’t give out energy for the benefit of others. He absorbs energy at others’ cost.”
– Francis O’Gorman, Worrying: A Literary and Cultural History
In other words, the worrier is the opposite of a lighthouse.
“I’ve suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened.”Mark Twain
But when a worry becomes a reality we realize how capable we are in dealing with it. We grow more resilient. Once we develop the courage to face our problems, like a lighthouse, we develop the energy to share our experience to console others.
To worry or not to worry, whatever happens, happens.
You are not our thoughts. Thoughts are just thoughts. But you are your actions. How you determine what’s reasonable and worth doing versus what’s irrational and worth ignoring demonstrates the emotional strength of your thinking mind.
As Eric Barker writes on his blog:
You’re not your brain; you’re the CEO of your brain. You can’t control everything that goes on in “Mind, Inc.” But you can decide which projects get funded with your attention and action. So when a worry is nagging at you, step back and ask: “Is this useful?”
Worrying is the attempt to control future events that rarely–wait, never happen! Anxiety is a thinking problem for which there are thinking solutions.
Socratic questioning will help you reframe negativity, as will the practice of acceptance. Permitting a bad thought, even exaggerating it, diminishes its effect: you get bored of it. Playing with dialectical forces ultimately reveals the truth.
You can strengthen your emotion muscle through some of the methods outlined below:
— Daniel Pink (@DanielPink) March 13, 2017
Worrying can be short-sighted and egotistical. FOMO, or fear of missing out, is a 21st-century problem driven by the use of smartphones. As David Brooks highlights in his article The Epidemic of Worry, ‘the worrier is the opposite of a lighthouse:’
“He doesn’t give out energy for the benefit of others. He absorbs energy at others’ cost.” – Francis O’Gorman, Worrying: A Literary and Cultural History